A Prius and Some Vicodin

We, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” seldom discuss the embarrassing moments of politicians’ progeny. Frankly, we don’t think that children’s faux pas necessarily speak badly of their parents. Call us dimwitted, but we think it’s true.

We mean, come on: President Bush’s daughters—or one of them, at any rate—are pretty much party girls. The only thing they love more than Miller Lite is fake IDs. Who cares? John Kerry’s daughter likes to flash her chest at the Cannes film festival crowd. So what?

Unsurprisingly, then, we are loath to discuss Al Gore III’s recent dust up with the authorities. Gore, the 24-year-old son of the morally censorious former vice president, was caught doing 100 miles an hour in a Toyota Prius. What’s more, police found marijuana, Xanax, Valium, Vicodin, and Adderall in his car.

To make matters even worse, young Mr. Gore doesn’t even possess prescriptions for any of the aforementioned drugs. Oh, dear. Not good at all.

Now, before you get worked up into a self-righteous lather, we mustn’t assume that the young Mr. Gore’s transgressions reflect poorly on Al and Tipper. So their kid made a bad mistake or nine. All kids—except for the young Ted Kennedy—make mistakes. Let’s not tire out our fingers wagging them in the direction of the former vice president.

Further, you have to admit—however begrudgingly—that Al Gore III was certainly thinking of his famous parents. After all, he got arrested on July 4th—a great day on the American calendar to bury embarrassing stories. You’re welcome, dad.

And let’s not forget the good news here: It is now officially documented that a Toyota Prius can go 100 miles per hour. Not too shabby for a green-conscious vehicle, now is it?

The only reason we mentioned this brouhaha at all, dear reader, is due to the fact that it seems to speak to the curious sort of morality encouraged by our friends on the political Left. We have long since recognized that our liberal pals scoff at all kinds of moral strictures—and have placed concern for the environment in their stead.

For this reason, as we’ve previously observed, one can have a child out of wedlock in this country without anyone batting an eyelash; but throw away an aluminum can and all heck breaks loose. Although we care about environmental matters too, we wouldn’t pretend think they’re a replacement for all other moral concerns.

Perhaps the young Mr. Gore’s drug-induced joy ride helps us recognize that owning a hybrid car isn’t the summum bonum his father believes it is.