June 25, 2007

A Change in Management?

As regular reader(s) of this humble “weblog” well know, not much changes around the comfy purlieus of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly.” We’ve had only one aesthetic tune-up during the course of our more than three-year history. And we’ve never so much as featured one picture on the “website”—that being beyond our admittedly limited technical capacities.

The content of this “weblog” hasn’t changed one iota either. Devoted reader(s) of this humble Internet outfit can always delight in our semi-humorous takes on semi-important semi-news stories or life’s little semi-irritants. In short, you can expect the same stuff on this “website”; we’re like the Internet version of death and taxes. (Provided, of course, you’re not an illegal immigrant; illegal immigrants don’t pay taxes and they never die.)

It is with some trepidation, therefore, that we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” announce potentially big changes to come for this “weblogging” outfit. Yes, we know, we know: That’s a hard sentence to take in. Perhaps we’ll establish some sort of psychological telephone-line for our reader(s), to help them cope with the possible changes.

You see, dear reader, Rupert Murdoch and his evil News Corp. are attempting to buy “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly.” As was recently not featured in the news, the Australian tycoon put up a hefty bid for this humble “weblog.” And this was surprising, insofar as “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” utterly lacking any advertisements, isn’t exactly a cash cow.

Clearly, the evil Mr. Murdoch wants to get his talons on “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly” for the prestige factor. Once he owns The Times of London, The New York Post, and “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” he pretty much has the trifecta of media classiness. In truth, then, we are but a likely pawn of this megalomaniac’s desire to run the world.

We must mention, however, that this is not a done deal. Right now, our buddies in the mainstream media are preparing scabrous reports about Mr. Murdoch’s shenanigans, which are clearly aimed at soiling his attempt at a “weblog” takeover. In addition, we hear that Al Franken may put up an alternate bit, thereby saving the crack young staff from slaving for the only non-Jew who runs the universe.

But what if it doesn’t work? Well, then you can bet our “weblog” will contain nothing but fawning praise for Rupert Murdoch, Australia, and Fox News. It won’t be pretty.

What’s more, we bet that Mr. Murdoch will also attempt to get his hands on Naked Villainy and the Llamabutchers, to add to his fancy Internet fiefdom. Clearly, the future of Al Gore’s World-Wide Web is at stake.

Posted at June 25, 2007 12:01 AM | TrackBack