Another Crack Young Staff Retreat

As regular reader(s) of this humble “weblog” well know, we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” have served up one charming animadversion each weekday for many, many moons. In fact, it has been so long since we began this humble “weblog” that soon we may be compelled to change our name to “the crack middle-aged staff.”

Well, we suppose it hasn’t been that long. Even so, we have taken some smidgen of pleasure from the fact that our readers can pretty much set their e-watches by us. Without fail, Monday through Friday you’ll hear from the crack young staff. You may hate every word we write—a distinct possibility—but we write it so regularly that we feel as if we’re the e-equivalent of Metamucil.

Every once in a great while, of course, we go on a vacation of sorts. You know: Hunting with Dick Cheney; windsurfing with John F. Kerry; nose picking with Ana Marie Cox. That sort of thing.

And, quite frankly, we think we’re entitled to it. For close to three years, we have brought countless amounts of joy and anger to the visitors on Al Gore’s World-Wide Web. What have we asked for in return? Not too darned much.

It is with only mild nervousness, then, that we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” announce that the entire staff—well over 250 people—is heading for a group retreat. You know: Clear the air; think fresh thoughts; eat lots of s’mores.

As a result of our upcoming time away from the Internet, we shall not be “posting” our typically hilarious and insightful commentary on all and sundry for a whole week: Wednesday, February 7 to Wednesday, February 14. We know, we know: That’s a long, long time to be without us.

Ah, but fear not. We are always thinking of you and your pleasure, dear reader. (In that respect, we’re quite different from your wife.)

We wouldn’t dream of leaving “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly” blank for a whole week. (Well, okay, we dreamed of it, but it wasn’t a particularly satisfying dream. In fact, it left us feeling kind of cold.)

Rather, we have successfully exhorted a master “weblogger” to take our august place. Regular reader(s) of this humble “weblog” already know and esteem our temporary replacement—none other than our Official Guest “Weblogger,” the Maximum Leader.

To those of you who don’t read the Maximum Leader’s devilishly charming “website” Naked Villainy, we have only one thing to say: Shame on you. But you can make up for your lapse: For one full week the Maximum Leader will bestow his e-genius upon you on this humble “website.”

One should look forward to this with, as Charles Dickens once wrote, great expectations. We certainly know that we’re leaving you in, as the marketing department of Allstate Insurance once wrote, good hands.