August 01, 2006

Filmography of Gibson

Greetings, readers of The Hatemonger's Quarterly. It is your Maximum Leader here at the anchor desk while the Crack Young Staff continues to lounge by the pool, sip drinks out of glasses with tiny umbrellas, and polish of Harlequin romance novels at the rate of two a day.

Surely by this time, dear reader, you've heard that one big-time Hollywood star has had a little bit of a run-in with "Johnny Law." And by "Johnny Law" your Maximum Leader really means the Los Angeles Sherriff’s Department, the Anti-Defamation League, the Simon Wiesenthal Center, and Nora Ephron. Yes, Hollywood star and self-proclaimed "owner" of Malibu, Mel Gibson was arrested last Friday night for driving his Lexus LS430 a good 42 mph over the posted speed limit.

Oh yes... Did we mention that Gibson was also battling his personal demons? It seems Gibson’s demons dwell in a bottle labeled Chivas Regal.

Anyhoo...

In light of the goings-on concerning Mr. Gibson, your Maximum Leader presents for you a fan’s abridged guide to the films of Mel Gibson.

Mad Max – In a post-apocalyptic world run by Jews, roving bands of motorized criminals terrorize the innocent. Max, a gentile highway patrolman before the apocalypse, sees his family killed by criminals and vows to get his revenge; and stop the Jews from ruining the already ruined world.

The Road Warrior – Gibson reprises his role of gentile-turned free-lance kicker of arse, Max. Max faces off against a marauding horde of circumcised dune-buggy driving criminals. Max attacks the marauding horde which gives a group of gentiles time to escape from their Jew-threatened compound.

Lethal Weapon – The original cop buddy movie. Gibson plays the slightly insane Detective Riggs who must break up an international drug smuggling ring. Riggs partners with African-American Detective Murtaugh to defeat the drug cartel which is beholden to the international conspiracy of illuminati and jews.

The Patriot – Gibson plays a reluctant American revolutionary who must fight to drive the jew-loving English out of the New World. The American revolutionaries fight to create a new nation, conceived in liberty; and free of the jewish yoke.

Braveheart – Gibson plays William Wallace, the gentile leader of the Scots in their crusade against the jew-loving English. The Scots fight to free their nation from the jewish yoke.

Your Maximum Leader hopes that this brief guide to the films of Mel Gibson helps you on your next trip to the video store.

Carry on.

Posted at August 1, 2006 12:51 AM | TrackBack