We’re Under Attack!

As was reported throughout the “weblogosphere,” the Mu.Nu server was under attack by a group of hackers. Well, at least by one hacker. But we’re sure that he’s really e-vicious. The kind of character you wouldn’t want to meet in a dark chat room.

In these trying times, dear reader, we want to answer a few questions for our concerned fans. First, we want you to know that we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” are doing fine. No one is hurt—except Ted, and he’s been nursing that groin pull for weeks now.

Also, we must inform you that we shall not bow to the demands of these hackers, whatever those demands may be. If you ask us—and, technically speaking, you did not—going along with the wishes of such thugs tells the e-terrorists that they have won.

So, sorry, hackers. Regardless of your desperate (albeit technically adroit) attempt to silence us, we shall survive. In fact, this is one of the things that makes us so like Gloria Gaynor. Well, other than the afros.

Five days a week, we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” will deliver our moronic brand of pseudo-humor, hackers be darned. It’s going to take a lot more than one server attack to knock us off of Al Gore’s World-Wide Web. (And no, unlike President Bush, we aren’t going to exhort the e-terrorists to “bring it on.” That would be unbecoming.)

We should also inform you that the attack has left us wondering about a few things. Most importantly, we are ruminating about the fact that as impressive an e-eminence as Glenn Reynolds, Al Gore’s famed Instapundit, mentioned the awful attack on his popular “weblog.”

More specifically, this led us to wonder: How can Glenn Reynolds be so darned concerned about Mu.Nu if he’s studiously—and incessantly—ignored every polite e-mail we’ve sent him about our own humble “weblog”? For over two years, dear reader, we’ve delivered a number of quaint e-missives informing Mr. Reynolds about our shenanigans on the World-Wide Web. And you can count his responses on no fingers.

Now, however, as the victims of an e-terrorist attack, Mr. Reynolds will likely be comin’ a-crawlin’ to us. He must be thinking: “How are you, crack young staff? Is everything okay?” Or words to that effect.

Well, heck no, Reynolds. We’re not giving our exclusive story of surviving e-terrorism against the odds to the likes of you. No, sir: We’re giving the scoop to this good fellow with the bejeweled, floppy hat. We know who our real friends are. How do you like ‘dem apples?