The Newest Neo-Con

Strolling around Al Gore’s World-Wide Web, as we are wont, we happened upon Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s letter to President Bush. Mr. Ahmadinejad, for those of you as clueless about terror-supporting states as terrorism “expert” Michael Scheuer, is the current Nutter-in-Chief in Iran.

Recently, this loon sent a strange missive to the Leader of the Free World, and Britain’s left-wing Guardian helpfully printed a version of it in their comments section. Since we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” read the epistle on-line, we had the opportunity to take in various reader responses, which are affixed to Mr. Ahmadinejad’s opus.

Naturally, The Guardian has a very high percentage of left-wing twits among its readership. In fact, we’d wager that the average Guardian reader thinks that the world ought to be governed entirely by Robert Fisk and Noam Chomsky.

As such, we particularly savored the responses to Mr. Ahmadinejad’s palaver that offered the typical “Okay, he’s a bit daft, but he’s got a darn good point” sentiment. And this was particularly delightful given that Mr. Ahmadinejad plumbs the depths of Holocaust denial in his missive. Ah, denying the Holocaust: Is there anything more progressive?

But one particular comment really stuck out. A reader named Nasser refers to Mr. Ahmadinejad as a "neo-conservative." Yep, that’s right; we didn’t make that up. To some dimwit, the President of Iran is a neo-con.

We found this delicious for a few reasons. First and foremost, we have noted that numerous British press outlets—The Guardian chief among them—throw the term “neo-conservative” around as if it’s merely a highfalutin synonym for “bad.” Anytime something awful happens, Polly Toynbee and her fellow unhinged dolts believe that “the neo-conservatives are at it again.”

Accordingly, we thought it was simply divine that some ignorant Guardian enthusiast came to the conclusion that Mr. Ahmadinejad is a card-carrying neo-conservative. After all, he’s unsavory. How much more proof do you require?

Does anyone else find the image of Mr. Ahmadinejad studying at the feet of Irving Kristol, Daniel Bell, and Norman Podhoretz humorous? Not any Guardian readers, we suppose.