June 09, 2005

Introducing “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly” Academic Of The Month

Introducing “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly” Academic of the Month

If you’re anything like us, dear reader, you simply can’t stomach all the guff today’s tenured college professor must endure. Not only is he (or, more likely nowadays, she) compelled to teach well-nigh three times per week, he is often forced to take in ego-withering assaults from the likes of The New York Times, The Boston Globe, and kindred right-wing outlets.

That’s why we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” have decided to inaugurate what we hope will be a new series of posts on our humble “weblog.” We call it our “Hatemonger’s Quarterly” Academic of the Month Program, and we aim to use it to highlight the masterful work of many a hard-working academic.

For future months, dear reader, we’ll exhort you to send us the curricula vitae of prospective Academics of the Month, so that we can make some sort of contest out of the whole deal.

Yet today, we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemoonger’s Quarterly,” have come up with our own winner, who will certainly glory in her status as the First-Ever “Hatemonger’s Quarterly” Academic of the Month (June 2005). We think you’ll agree that our selection is eminently worthy of the award we have bestowed upon her.

Indeed, the victor (or, as she’d undoubtedly prefer, victress) of the June 2005 crown is one Sherryl Kleinman, a professor of sociology at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill.

Ms. Kleinman’s “webpage” perfectly encapsulates her complete lack of narcissism. We, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” have always said: “Only an idiot quotes himself.” To this end, Ms. Kleinman’s “webpage” begins with an epigraph from Ms. Kleinman, pertaining to Ms. Kleinman’s lifelong passion for sociology. No self-love here, naturally!

Among the tidbits mentioned on Ms. Kleinman’s “website” is the following:

A few of my colleagues and I are putting together a new undergraduate minor—Social and Economic Justice—that will be housed in the Department of Sociology.

Gee: A minor in Social and Economic Justice, eh? Just because Ms. Kleinman appears to have no background in economics doesn’t mean that she can’t pontificate on the topic, does it? Certainly not!

And just in case you are distraught at the possibility that Ms. Kleinman may use her lectern as a bully pulpit to wax hegemonic, she offers this gem of a sentence:

My central concern as a sociologist is to understand, and then change, patterns of inequality.

Ah, yes. The Good Doctor (or, as she’d undoubtedly prefer, Doctress) pines not simply to study “inequality,” but also to eradicate it. In other words, Ms. Kleinman aims to use her classroom as a left-wing indoctrination camp.

May we humbly suggest that she start by opposing preferential treatment in academia for so-called “underrepresented” minorities and women? That sure seems to be an example of what she’s talking about, but we have the sneaking suspicion that her all-encompassing dedication to the elimination of “inequality” doesn’t go that far.

How about Ms. Kleinman kindly give up large portions of her salary, and distribute them to her ineluctably indigent graduate students? We won’t hold our collective breath.

Our favorite line from Ms. Kleinman’s self-hagiography is this:

In the last several years my work has become increasingly critical and feminist.

To which, we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” respond: Don’t you mean “critical or feminist”? We don’t perceive that academic feminists tend to be particularly critical of academic feminism. The “patriarchy,” male “oppression”—these are the fusty orthodoxies of the Women’s Studies set.

For all of the above reasons, we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” blithely bestow Sherryl Kleinman with the prestigious title of Academic of the Month. We hope the award doesn’t go to her head. But we have the impression that it may.

If you, dear reader, have any particularly worthy academicians in mind for future Academics of the Month, send us their resumés by clicking on the Contact Us link at the top right-hand corner on your computer screen. It’s an opportunity to show your appreciation for your favorite tenured radicals.

Posted at June 9, 2005 12:01 AM | TrackBack