July 29, 2005

Moving Day We, the crack

Moving Day

We, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” want to inform you, dear reader, that in the coming week we shall be changing our official headquarters. Ever since our deep-pocketed financial backers allowed us to increase the size of the staff by almost 47 percent, we have grown far too large for the current building.

Accordingly, dear reader, this next week will be an unpleasant one: We must pack up all our computers, our drink coasters, and all our back issues of New Left Review, and await the arrival of our official moving company. Luckily, Allied Van Lines has agreed to haul our belongings to the new locale—that way, our move will be both inconvenient and expensive.

As you might imagine, this will leave us, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” awfully busy in the week to come. For we must bid a tearful adieu to our old headquarters, and make our way to the new digs. Once there, of course, we must set about arranging our new Llamabutchers throw-pillows in just the right places.

We mention this all to you, dear reader, because our move will necessitate a week’s break for the crack young staff. And, to be honest, it isn’t a particularly fortuitous time to take such a short hiatus: As our regular readers undoubtedly realize, we have yet to announce the winner of our Official Worst Bumper Sticker Contest. Still, moving—like nature—is calling.

But fear not, dear reader. We wouldn’t up and leave you alone. On the contrary: All next week, the humble “weblogging” to appear on this humble “website” will be the work of one of the true geniuses of Al Gore’s World-Wide Web. Frankly, we’re a bit surprised that such an outstanding eminence agreed to fill in for a spell.

Naturally, we are speaking about the great Maximum Leader himself. For those of you hopelessly retardataire, allow us to inform you that the Maximum Leader is the esteemed proprietor of Naked Villainy, a “weblog” for those who enjoy their mischievousness unclothed.

We, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” have been reading the Maximum Leader’s humorous animadversions religiously, and we’re delighted that he’s going to be “guest weblogging.” Naked Villainy, unlike “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” is an award-winning “website”: Just last year, it snagged the coveted “Most Naked Villains” prize.

And a quick pop over to the Naked Villainy “website” will demonstrate that the Maximum Leader’s “weblog” is a wee bit classier than our Luddite digs. Whereas his “weblog” astounds you with impressive graphics, our “website” looks like a poor man’s outhouse.

So, dear reader, each day next week, check out humble “website,” and glory in the wit and whimsy that is the Maximum Leader, the self-proclaimed “enema of the state.”

Posted at July 29, 2005 12:01 AM | TrackBack