A Nation of Double Standards

Boy, the vast right-wing conspiracy is really pissing us off. As if it weren’t enough for this insidious cabal to lie about Bill Clinton’s purported sexual acts with a husky intern, now it has the gall to up the ante even more. That’s right, dear reader: As you may have heard around Al Gore’s World-Wide Web, the evil forces of conservatism have now scored a double whammy on former President Clinton by…asking him a question.

Gosh, Karl Rove and his minions are a really horrid bunch, aren’t they? Can you believe the nerve of these people: Compelling Fox News’ Chris Wallace—surely a Rupert Murdoch puppet—to offer the former philanderer-in-chief a perfectly reasonable query? It’s simply abominable.

Mark these words, dear reader. When the evil forces of reaction forced Chris Wallace to ask the following question, our great nation must have plunged to some hitherto unfathomable nadir: “Why didn’t you do more to put bin Laden and al Qaeda out of business when you were president?” Oh, the horror!

We mean, come on: Just because Mr. Clinton was sufficiently foolish during his presidency to treat Islamist terrorism as a policing matter instead of an act of war is no reason to ask him one tough question about his 8-year term in office. Okay, okay: Islamo-fascist terrorists grew increasingly brazen in their anti-Western activity under President Clinton’s watch—so what? There’s no reason to get all bent out of shape and ask him about this.

Aren’t some things simply off limits? Aren’t some things beyond the pale? Surely crucial issues of security and foreign policy are such things?

Thankfully, dear reader, our pals at The Nation have leapt to the defense of poor Bill Clinton. More specifically, one John Nichols, a nutter who appears to possess one of the worst toupees in American history, has composed a rousing screed for the magazine that takes aim at those disgraceful Zionazis at Fox News.

To this end, Mr. Nichols informs us that, as the result of one question, Bill Clinton was “a target of our drive-by media.” Thus does an orange-haired buffoon offer a tip of the cap to Rush Limbaugh in order to defend the beleaguered former president. It seems as if one must treat Bubba with some kid gloves, doesn’t it?

Now, as delighted as we were that The Nation rushed to hide Bill Clinton from the slings and arrows of one question, we couldn’t help but notice the lefty rag’s blatant hypocrisy. After all, this is a magazine that gave accolades and column space to Helen Thomas, whose entire claim to fame is offering ranting, partisan potshots at the Bush administration during its press conferences.

How in the Good Lord’s name can The Nation champion Helen Thomas’ incessant propagandistic nonsense and denounce one entirely legitimate query from Chris Wallace? It seems, dear reader, to speak to a level of intellectual dishonesty that one might think even as sordid an outfit as The Nation would avoid.