December 19, 2005

Mu-Nu-ving on Up

Welcome to our new humble “website”! As we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” noted in Friday’s humble “post”—the last full “post” to be “posted” on our ole’ “Blogspot” digs—we have been sufficiently fortunate to change our “website’s” address. For well nigh two years, dear reader, as folks who call “Blogspot” home, we have been treated as the Internet equivalent of Ricki Lake. In short, no one wanted to touch us.

But no longer. The “web” geniuses at MuNu have graciously invited us to join their convivial cluster of “webloggers.” Naturally, dear reader, we (literally) jumped at the opportunity. After all, many of our e-favorites inhabit the MuNu sphere: The delicately titled Llamabutchers, Dr. Rusty Shackelford, phin, et al. In fact, we simply can’t wait to stroll through our new MuNu “links,” and see what erstwhile hidden e-treasures await.

Naturally, then, we must inform you that our “web” address has changed: It’s now or To be honest, if you are already reading this humble “post,” you probably recognize this. Either that, or you have sustained some sort of nasty cranial injury.

Many of our devoted reader(s) likely have all kinds of questions about our new move to MuNu. As such, we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” decided to spend today’s humble “post” answering a series of potential e-queries, which we feel could be “frequently asked questions” if we did not figuratively head them off at the figurative pass.

Without much in the way of further ado, then, we are delighted to announce our Official Responses to Unofficial Questions Regarding Our E-Move:

“The Hatemonger’s Quarterly” Official Responses to Unofficial Questions Regarding Our E-Move

Q: Now that you guys have moved to a fancier address, can we still expect the same brand of knee-slapping hilarity we have come to love from your luminous animadversions?

A: Boy, you are really laying it on thick with that question, reader. “The same brand of knee-slapping hilarity”? Geez: You need to get out more often.

Q: If I recall correctly, you were trounced in the 2005 Weblog Awards. Is your move to MuNu some sort of informal penance?

A: Well, that was a really obnoxious query. Okay, so we performed wretchedly in the 2005 Weblog Awards. Do we need to be reminded of this fact every cotton-pickin’ minute? For cryin’ out loud. We don’t bring up your failures every day, you obnoxious dolt.

Q: Why must you cast aspersions at “Blogspot”? Sure, it isn’t a perfect program, but it served you well for close to two years. Don’t you owe the folks at “Blogspot” a little appreciation?

A: Jesus! Is this our mothers writing in? Sure, we admit that “Blogspot” isn’t that horrid. But it’s still the Internet equivalent of Detroit. If you moved to Phoenix from Gary, Indiana, would you owe thanks to the hoodlums from Gary, or would you simply thank your luck stars that you left that hellhole?

Q: As a longtime reader of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” I’ve gotten to know the crack young staff pretty well. And let me just say that I am pretty into you guys. I’m not sure if you are dating or not, but I’ve often wondered what it may be like to take you fellahs and ladies out for a night on the town. You know, do it classy: An early candlelight dinner at a nice French bistro around the corner; a Dittersdorf string quartet playing in the background; key lime pie. Afterwards we’d head to a show, perhaps the film or Broadway version of Rent. And then I’d try to get you guys to come back to my place. I’d lovingly take your coats at the door, caressing your shoulders as I helped you slip them off. Michael Bolton would be on the hi-fi—“When a Man Loves a Woman,” or some such. After a cocktail or two, we’d really start to get to knowing one another. So, I suppose my question is: Are you guys free on Friday?

A: Alright, that’s enough with the questions. We’ve really freaked ourselves out with that last one.

Posted at December 19, 2005 12:00 AM | TrackBack